Heart Orgasms

Note: Any articles mentioned will be linked at the bottom.

Heart Orgasm is one of my favorite terms to use.

I first heard of “Heart Orgasms” when I was studying the art duo FASTWÜRMS in college. They are an Ontario based couple comprised of Dai Skuse and Kim Kozzi.

As an interview by Mark Laliberte from 2009 states:

Formed in 1979, FASTWÜRMS is an ongoing avatar-artist cultural project, the trademark and the joint authorship of Kim Kozzi and Dai Skuse. These Toronto/Creemore-based multidisciplinary artists create art works that meld high and popular cultures, bent identity politics, social exchange and a no-budget cinematic sensibility. FASTWÜRMS is a Witch identified art practice based firmly on punk and DIY outsider traditions. Employing a dark but often playful sense of humour, they freely mingle media, disciplines and art forms to question nature, the environment and issues of power.”

In a separate article written for cmagazine98 by Jon Davies is when I first came across the term.

[quote] “When I mentioned how little academic attention the phenomenon of animal cuteness receives and the oftentimes physical, gut reaction felt in the face of cuteness, Skuse dubbed the feeling a heart orgasm and slyly pointed out that this visceral response is precisely what many find lacking in contemporary art, a cool detachment that some blame for arts inability to attract a lay audience. It is no surprise that animal imagery is so omnipresent in visual culture, considering how its pleasures are so instinctive and affective.” [/unquote]

I was immediately drawn to this term. Having a word to describe how the heart feels when faced with something you deem incredibly cute was inspirational to me. After researching the duo further and reflecting on the term itself, I decided to start using the term regularly.

As I continued to use the term throughout the years, it’s meaning started to grow and change. Now I use it for anything that makes my heart feel big or excited. For example, it could still be a cute cat, but it can also be finding a beautiful tree, seeing a wonderful show, listening to music that inspires me, etc.

I find that when I first use the term with people, it can be awkward, as it is not a common term. I usually explain the origin so that people can have an understanding of the meaning. However, being able to express that type of feeling that never had a word that quite felt right to me is empowering. I will continue to use this term. I hope that as the years continue to pass, the term continues to grow and change as my vocabulary also grows and changes.

Article with Quote: FASTWÜRMS (jondavies.ca)

Article with Interview: Fastwurms inteview (marklaliberte.com)

Photo taken and edited by Luna Fyrewillow.

June 2021

Hello Friends, Family, and Foes. Here is my monthly update for June 2021. If you would like to receive other information on a monthly basis, please sign up for the EarthShine monthly newsletter (form found on the CONTACT page).

Big Events:

Drum Circle - June 28th
Litha - June 20-22nd
Pride Month

Highlights:

- I pet a turkey.
- Got a diagnosis for ADHD.
- Town hit record heat for a week.
- I met a bunch of cute chickens and kittens.

Below are some of the things I record over a month. The reason I record them is to track what media I am consuming so that I can identify if it is reflecting on any of my opinions or thoughts. I adapt very easily to things that I like, which can show in my personality and words. This is the way that I keep myself mindful of what I do and say.

Songs of the Month:
- Land of the Living - Johnathan Young
- Medicine Man - Dorothy
- Villan - Tre Watson feat. Captain Graveyard cover
- Habits (Stay High) - Tove Lo
- Feed my Frankenstein - Alice Cooper
- MONTERO (Call Me By Your Name) - Tre Watson Feat. Alice Kane Wolf cover
- MONTERO (Call Me By Your Name) - Lil Nas X
- Giants - True Damage

Video Games Played:
- Stardew Valley

Books Read:
- The Art of Psychic Protection - Judy Hall
- Caste Heaven #6 - Chise Ogawa
- Netporn - Katrien Jacobs
- Boys Love Manga and Beyond: History. Culture, and Community in Japan - (Edited by) Mark McLelland, Kazumi Nagaike, Katsuhiko Suganuma, and James Welker.
- Becoming Dangerous - Witchy Femmes, Queer Conjurers, and Magical Rebels. - (Edited by) Katie West and Jasmine Elliot
- Uzumaki - Junji Ito
- Vanilla Essence - Yamatogawa

Movie and Shows watched:
- Why Did You Kill Me? - Documentary
- Illuminaughti Documentaries - Youtube
- Inferno - Movie
- Hextian Doll Customizations - Youtube
- Willam Belli content - Youtube
- Moving Parts - Trixie Mattel
- Roll Red Roll - Documentary
- Step Up 5: All In - Movie
- Choreography Videos - 1Million Dance Studio (Youtube)

See Everyone Next Month!

<3

Primal and Pet Play

Content Warning: Pet-Master/Submissive-Dominant/Predator-Prey Dynamics, BDSM, Kink, Primal, Sex.

This blog entry is focused on my personal relationships with the terms “Primal” and “Pet”.

Pet play is a kink that I have a lot of experience in, though I have discovered that I prefer to be connected to the Primal term. As I have gone through my research, I have concluded that I am more interested in the realm of predator/prey instead of still living within the realm of master/pet. There was always something that did not feel quite right about being a pet, though the main theme of being an animal was still enticing.

I still wear collars quite often, but I have never really considered them a specific item to be used only as a pet. As for anal plugs, I do like the tail ones, but I have discovered that my enjoyment of the tail plugs is more about the anal stimulation and less about it being a tail for the sake of being a pet. These days, I tend to prefer a jeweled or stainless steel ones, as they are much easier to clean and maintain. Most of my paws, ears, leashes, and attachable tails have taken a back seat in my life. These days I only take them out for aesthetic purposes instead of for sexual desires. I still love the aesthetics of Pet Play, though I am not interested in personally being a part of a pet/master dynamic.

One of the parts I struggled with the most about being a pet was the sense of humiliation some of the acts were designed to bring across. I was always more after the sense of animalistic nature and acting out being a creature instead of a human. For me, it became less about the dominant/submissive nature of the role-play. I wanted to fight back, to bite and scratch while not being “punished” for it in a Sub/Dom form. Therefore, I spent a lot of time thinking about my relationship with pet-play and concluded that the pleasure I was after was slightly different.

However, some parts of pet play scenes I did enjoy. My favorite was being on my knees and being told by my dominant to offer them pleasure. It was less about the demands and more about a person looming over me and my actions practically bringing them to their knees too. My second favorite was feeling a tug on my collar as my dominant would guide me where they wanted my mouth to be. I like the feeling of a collar being pulled on in the same way that I like the feeling of tights on my thighs.

My least favorite aspects of the pet play scenes was being restrained from certain animalistic characteristics that I wanted to show through. Two things I have come to know that I love to do is bite and scratch. As a pet, I was often told that it was considered “bad” behavior and that a punishment would be in order. Even so far as restraining my hands within pet gloves (with my consent) so I would be unable to use my “claws”.  I realized that I wanted my partners to fight back with the same passion instead of restraining it.

Thinking all these things over as I continued my research and self reflection, I have concluded that rather than being a submissive pet (though I still have submissive qualities that I enjoy), I am in the realm of Predator/Prey (also known as Primal play).

 A “Primal” (which can also be specified as “Predator/Prey” dynamics if Submission/Dominance roles are used) is someone who enjoys primal play. Primal play is a style of BDSM that focuses on the raw feelings and actions that are evoked by natural impulses and urges. Social norms and niceties are discarded for those natural impulses and urges. The civilized shell most people carry gives way to emotions and sexual desire that ranges from happiness, joy, playfulness, silliness, sadness, and grief. It is letting go of all structures society places on us as we become our raw and wild selves.

Primal play is based around the concept of retreating to the primitive “animalistic” persona of the human experience, where labels and protocols do not apply. Wrestling, pulling hair back, biting, scratching, and growling are some of the many things that fit into this style of BDSM. If there is a high level of trust between two partners (which there should be for all sexual acts with others) primal play can be very intimate and explosive as a BDSM sex practice. It opens you up to your partner in new and vulnerable ways that they may have never seen.

I am Wild. I am Raw. I am Primal.

Photo Taken by Luna Fyrewillow. Model: Luna Fyrewillow.

English Definitions #1

When starting projects, I like to start with words related to it and become comfortable with those words and their formal meanings. I like to start with writing down the definitions and looking up some synonyms (my personal favorite part of language). Here are three of the words that I looked up this month (June 2021) for one reason or another.

Content Warning: Orgasm.

~ Cosmic: Cos·mic: /ˈkäzmik/
adjective

1. Relating to the universe or cosmos.
   Synonyms: stellar, space, planetary, galactic, celestial, extraterrestrial, astral, astronomical, intergalactic, interstellar, interplanetary, astronomic, cosmical, heavenly, cosmogonic, outer space, in space, from space, cosmological, astrophysical, starry, star, ethereal, solar, universal, stellular, astrological, otherworldly, lunar, heliacal, empyreal, in outer space, Martian, alien, unearthly.

2. Significantly large in size, amount, value or degree.
   Synonyms: huge, immense, enormous, vast, massive, colossal, gigantic, monumental, prodigious, tremendous, monstrous, gargantuan, mountainous, elephantine, humongous, mighty, mega, whopping, grand, herculean, gigantesque pharaonic, oceanic, boundless, infinite, immeasurable, limitless, grandiose, fathomless, astronomical, towering, expansive, indefinite countless.

3. Of or relating to the whole world or planet.
   Synonyms: universal, general, global, omnipresent, worldwide, overarching, all-embracing, comprehensive, planetary, ecumenical, widespread, extensive, inclusive, ubiquitous, unlimited, unrestricted, generic, multinational, unifying, international, astronomical, celestial, mundane, total, diverse, varied, open-minded, large-scale, all-encompassing, all-embracing, infinite, permeating, unanimous, predominant, popular, abundant, boundless, everywhere.

4. Of, or like, a god/dess.
   Synonyms: divine, heavenly, godlike, holy, goddesslike, immaculate, spiritual, angelic, celestial, mystical, supernatural, deitylike, mystic, sacred, seraphic, supreme, ethereal, hallowed, immortal, transcendent, almighty, incorporeal, metaphysical, omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient, astral, otherworldly, beyond human, alluring, exquisite, magical, eternal, pure, exalted, miraculous, golden, ideal, progressive, innocent, awe-inspiring, inspirational, illimitable, everlasting, deathless.
   
   ~ Orgasm: or·gasm: /ˈôrˌɡazəm/
   noun

   1. A spasm or sudden contraction.
      Synonyms: climax, cumming, pleasure, ejaculation, peak, spasm, the big O, sexual climax, wet dream, emission.

   verb

   1. To experience a physical orgasm.
      Synonyms: climax, cum, achieve orgasm, reach orgasm, have an orgasm, feel the earth move, ejaculate, get off, squirt, cream, spurt.

   
   ~ Ubiquitous: u·biq·ui·tous: /yo͞oˈbikwədəs/
   adjective

   1. Present, appearing, or found everywhere.
      Synonyms: omnipresent, global, universal, worldwide, infinite, prevalent, ubiquitary, international, widespread, astronomical, pervading, predominant, rampant, unrestricted, comprehensive, inescapable, worldly, broad, common, pervasive, abundant, permeating, rife, overarching, extensive, penetrating, immanent, cosmic, endless, insidious, limitless, cyclopedic, unanimous, ceaseless, never-ending, copious, extreme, the big picture, full-spectrum, life-changing.

   2. Very commonly encountered or observed.
      Synonyms: common, commonplace, normal, regular, conventional, customary, standard, rampant, universal, everyday, typical, constant, familiar, stereotypical, habitual, routine, mainstream, pervasive, prevalent, generic, ordinary, uninspired, unexciting, plain, vanilla, stale, trite, bland, tame, unnoteworthy, inconspicuous, passionless, literal, unemotional, factual, unadorned, inane, meaningless, of little consequence, of little importance, not worth mentioning, of no importance, of no great concern, as dry as dust, neither one thing nor the other.

   3. Being fully accessible and obtainable with little regard to restrictions.
      Synonyms: available, public, unrestricted, common, free-for-all, free for use, furnished, omnipresent, open, prevalent, provided, supplied, universal, widespread, appropriable, mutual, joint collective, pooled, conjoint, cooperative, collaborative, communistic, combined, reciprocated, requited, ensemble, planned, prearranged, cohesive, amalgamated, integrated, all-inclusive, across-the-board, overarching, harmonious, unconditional.

   4. Socially obligatory.
      Synonyms: conventional, customary, normal, orthodox, standard, compulsory, mandatory, necessary, obligatory, required, right, a must, called for.

   adverb

   1. Common or widely distributed.
      Synonyms: everywhere, all over, all around, everyplace, exhaustively, extensively, high and low, throughout, worldwide, near and far, thoroughly, here and there, in all places, in every part, in every spot, omnipresent, overall, universally, far and wide, inside and out, in every nook and cranny, in all directions, far and near.
      

Photo Taken by Luna Fyrewillow.

9-5: A Sad Tale of Human Nature.

This Creative Concept is an excerpt from 2018’s project paper from a Metal Arts class focusing on Welding.

Content Warning: Language, aggressive tone.

9-5: A Sad Tale of Human Nature.

We repress nature through our man-made urbanite lifestyles. Yet we fucking sexualize its wild beauty by twisting it to be in sync with our own arrogant agendas. An example of how people twist nature; is that we go about our lives barely passing a thought about the concrete, steel, and glass life we choose to surround ourselves with. We are nothing but phantom shells wrapped up in our own minds and jobs. We fucking sit there in our self made cages, yearning for the freedom that nature offers. I don’t know if it’s our idiocy or audacity showing as we stare at these fake versions of beautiful and lush Paradise. We view nature as this “God/dess” that is unattainable.

We lust for it as we choose these beautiful and natural spaces to plaster our desktop backgrounds and calendars. As we sit at our desks, looking at these spaces whenever we take a moment from our endless tasks. We fantasize and yearn about those images throughout the day. And we continue to do nothing about it.

Since we are on the path anyways, let’s yearn so fucking hard that we decide we cannot be without nature. We use our sick obsession with shoving everything into our own tailored boxes to build fucking shrines too. We constructed perfect prisons for nature in which we molded it to be flawless to our eyes. People will go to and build these spaces to experience the beauty of nature instead of going out into the wilderness as it was naturally made. Where the beauty is manicured and edited to fit our possessive habits. Yet, that beauty is meant to be wild and dangerous. Full of light and dark. Allowed to grow.

Yet, we would rather have full control over what should be free. Just like society.

People and Nature need to be in tune. Our bodies flow with the moon, our spirits are begging to be freed. We are Nature. We are wild. We are powerful, We can be whatever we want to be, fully in our own power. We don’t need to stay in these cramped graves we built for ourselves. We can stand up for our True Selves. We are ready to fucking howl.
(2018)

Photo Taken by Luna Fyrewillow.